Cry Baby

When you cry on a pillow
Or tears fall on your cheek
It's just emotions overflowing
Not a sign of being weak

We show emotions in different ways
We can often lose control
We cry of memories cherished
The ones in my heart and soul

So when I cry I'm not ashamed
It's not a thing I try to hide
Teardrops flow when I feel pain
Why keep it bottled inside

Source: http://www.things-to-say.com/greeting-poem/teardrops.htm

I’ll never let you see
The way my broken heart is hurting me.
I’ve got my pride,
And I know how to hide
All the sorrow and pain:
I’ll do my crying in the rain.
Someday when my crying’s done,
I’m gonna wear a smile and walk in the sun.
I may be a fool,
But till then, darling, you’ll
Never see me complain:
I’ll do my crying in the rain.

Author: Howard Greenfield

So i put on my make up put a smile on my face and if anyone ask me everything is ok, I'm laughing cuz no one knows the joke is on me cuz im dyin inside with my pride and a smile on my face...on my face singing, la la la, la la, lalala, la la, la la, la la, la la, la la, la la la laaaa

Artist: Tamia




Okay, what's with all the boohoo reference? Well, to put it bluntly, I abhor the idea of bawling my eyes out - I hate crying. Every time I cry I feel terrible, like I did something appalling. I don't know who instilled that idea in my head, that crying is bad, but it's stuck with me. It's supposed to alleviate the soul or something, take the pain away, but for me, it just seems to make me miserable.

It's not that I don't cry, I do, I just don't cry in public. When my Grandfather died (Dec 11, 2001) we were in Perpetual, room 7 of the ICU- every one was crying, except me... When I got home, when I was in the confines of my room, that's when I allowed myself to cry. A friend of mine (since we were psych students) told me that I am a very repressed individual (hopefully I won't become some sociopath as a result of all this). What does that mean? (for non psych majors)

Psych Terms 101

Repression is a defense mechanism first described by Sigmund Freud, as a way that people keep unpleasant memories out of their conscious mind. Repression is a compensatory style that deals with threat and stress by blocking unpleasant emotional experiences that might bring up anxiety, distress and vulnerability.

They feel attacked and then distance and isolate from others when they are stressed. They avoid talking about and rehashing unpleasant experiences as this adds to their stress. They become emotionally inaccessible to others when they feel the problem has been solved by their solution of dismissing it.

(Source: http://www.angriesout.com/grown16.htm)

Short Notes:
Repressed individuals do not like:
a. confronting their problems, they escape from it or block it out
b. to talk about their problems, it makes them more upset about it

Truth to tell, I don't let people in, I have a wall of ice surrounding my heart that people have to thaw in order to really get to the core- or get to know me. People say I'm very complex- I am. I'm compelled to blog about this, because for some unfathomable reason I have experienced many bawling attacks just recently, much to my sheer vexation. I thought only one person could break me, it seems two or three people have acquired that power AND it scares the living daylights out of me.

Yes, I am rather odd right? As a child, I was kept in seclusion, I wasn't allowed to go out and play (till I entered school I think). As a result of being kept in "captivity" I had trouble making friends when I entered Nursery, or actually, I didn't want to make friends, I wanted to be alone. That is why I was called "The Queen" by my teachers, on account of the fact that in a very regal way; I often dismissed the very friendly kids that tried to play with me, like they were paupers. It's funny right?

Slowly I did learn to socialize, but I'm pretty much a huge recluse. Back then, I mostly enjoyed sitting in a corner and reading books. All my life I have been kept in seclusion, not allowed to party at night or go on long jaunts in the mall- protective parents you see...

About the socializing thing, I have friends, not a lot, but I have friends. I don't like to keep a gigantic circle of friends. I prefer to have let's say: one or two close buds whom I totally trust. I mean, there are "friends" that keep you company, "friends" that you went to school with, "friends" that you work with, "friends" that you party with- but when times are rough, and some of the aforementioned "friends" bail out on you- that's when you know who your real friends are, the people who actually can tell when you're in the doldrums even before you speak about it- those are the friends I keep close.

Unfortunately, not all my friends know me. It's not their fault- I just like the cloak and dagger life. I'm like Batman, somebody very close to me said in jest."You're just like Batman, and your Batcave is your room..."

Song stuck in my head (my best friend's favorite song, or at least one of them)

my favorite part

So live like you mean it
Love til you feel it
It's all that we need in our lives
So stand on the edge with me
Hold back your fear and see
Nothing is real til it's gone

Hold on before its too late
Until we leave this behind
Don't fall just be who you are
It's all that we need in our lives

Hmmm... how in the world will people get to know me?

Trish 101

1. I'm a girl and I'm Batman

TO BE CONTINUED

I'm Not That Girl

I saw this video on YouTube: http://youtube.com/watch?v=_gX8hF1OxAg&feature=related. It was a clip from The Little Mermaid, but the song playing in the background was taken from the soundtrack of a Broadway musical entitled Wicked. Here are the lyrics:

Hands touch, eyes meet
Sudden silence, sudden heat
Hearts leap in a giddy whirl
He could be that boy
But I'm not that girl:

Don't dream too far
Don't lose sight of who you are
Don't remember that rush of joy
He could be that boy
I'm not that girl

Ev'ry so often we long to steal
To the land of what-might-have-been
But that doesn't soften the ache we feel
When reality sets back in

Blithe smile, lithe limb
She who's winsome, she wins him
Gold hair with a gentle curl
That's the girl he chose
And Heaven knows
I'm not that girl:

Don't wish, don't start
Wishing only wounds the heart
I wasn't born for the rose and the pearl
There's a girl I know
He loves her so
I'm not that girl.

OUCH. haha what a sad song. It reminds me of the scene in The Little Mermaid wherein Ariel finds Prince Eric with another woman (Ursula incognito) and well, the song works for that particular scene... Very sad, and bloody painful. haha

Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead

Munchkins:
Ding Dong! The Witch is dead. Which old Witch? The Wicked Witch!
Ding Dong! The Wicked Witch is dead.
Wake up - sleepy head, rub your eyes, get out of bed.
Wake up, the Wicked Witch is dead. She's gone where the goblins go,
Below - below - below. Yo-ho, let's open up and sing and ring the bells out.
Ding Dong' the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low.
Let them know
The Wicked Witch is dead!

Ah....but first........ Let me just remind some folks who are not familiar with the movie, that a great deal of the dialogues in this blog are borrowed from the actual WIzard of Oz movie- some parts are edited by yours truly though haha

"There's no place like home" Dorothy said and clicked her ruby red slippers. "There's no place like home..." And magically she wakes up in her own home. Realization dawns: somehow she had managed to dream about a twister carrying her to another land, where she meets a bunch of really short people- Munchkins, a scarecrow, a tin man, a lion, a good witch, (do I really have to mention all the characters??) a bad witch with very green complexion...

Wicked Witch of the West: Who killed my sister? Who killed the Witch of the East? Was it you?
Dorothy: No, no. It was an accident. I didn't mean to kill anybody.
Wicked Witch of the West: Well, my little pretty, I can cause accidents, too!

OH and this dude...

Wizard of Oz: You are talking to a man who has laughed in the face of death, sneered at doom and chuckled at catastrophe.

What's with this reference to the 1939 movie "The Wizard Of OZ" anyway?

Well, just like Dorothy I had the strangest dream and it involved a WITCH!!!!! Good thing I woke up and realized son of a---- witch! It was only a dream- but Freud wouldn't dismiss it too quickly for as we all know (I'm referring to psych majors here) when you have a dream about something, you must always look into the latent and manifest contents of your dream.

Dream analysis 101 (quick lesson)

Dream interpretation was made a part of Psychoanalysis in the 19th century if I am not mistaken. There are two parts of every dream:

1. Lantent
2. Manifest

The Manifest content of the dream is used to analyze the Latent content. Before I start elucidating on the aforementioned terms,allow me to add a little preamble.

You see, according to Freud, dreams are born in the unconscious and they ripple out when we sleep. They are in a way our repressed desires trying to bloom out of their silent graves, as it were. Dreams are extensions of our waking lives, in dreams we get to do the things we don't normally do when we are awake, we get to be the hero, the star, and sometimes the most disturbing things do pop into our dreams aside from the blissful ones.

Dreamland is the looking glass that we peer into wherein our fears, hidden desires, and certain emotions that we do not acknowledge when we are awake allow themselves to appear.

According to Freud: Dreams are 'a disguised fulfilment of repressed wishes'

Translation:Our real desires come out in our dreams, and we somehow achieve them through the dreams that we have.

He belived that some (or maybe all) dreams are about "wish fullfilment" even the bad ones, and that they contain deep messages, which are hidden or are like codes floating around (think The da Vinci Code). Anyway, these symbols or messages lead to us, they are personal and they reflect our own experiences.

Back to the terms: So, the manifest content of the dream is what we actually dream about, while the lantent content is the unfulfilled wish that the dream represents. I didn't really say, that dream interpretation is simple people, but that's the whole shebang right there. Freud says that dreams are sometimes an expression of a repressed (silent or hidden) wish that we would rather not admit to.

This leads us to Free assiciation, a technique used by Freud to analyze dreams, it works like this: A person is told to consider not just literal content of the dream but rather he/she should try to dig deep into the thoughts, feelings, and emotions that the dream creates. Which in turn will point to more feelings and emotions- like a chain.

Example:

I had a dream, that I was running away from a man who was holding a knife. I was scared, I was confused. I didn't know why he was chasing me. He reminds me of my uncle who is very ominous when he's drunk, I'm scared of my uncle. blah blah....

Please don't let me interpret my dream, since having one dream is not enough to derive the whole history or basic story of your issues- there is a process involved, and well, I'm no Freudian analyst nor have I mastered how to apply free association.

Back to my dream now...

I was Dorothy and I landed on top of the Wicked Witch of the West's sister, she was tres' pissed- and well, she was out for blood. I was with my dog Spud (the dog in the movie was called Toto). The Witch stared at me malevolently.

Wicked Witch: 'll get you,my pretty, and your little dog, too



Then this good Witch shows up and tells me to go to the Wizard of Oz, it seems he will help save my derriere from being fried by the Wicked Witch...



Good Witch:Pooh - what a smell of sulphur! I'm afraid you've made rather a bad enemy of the Wicked Witch of the West. The sooner you get out of Oz altogether, the safer you'll sleep, my dear.

Me: Oh, I'd give anything to get out of Oz altogether, but - which is the way back to Cebu City? I can't go the way I came.

Good Witch: No, that's true. The only person who might know would be the great and wonderful Wizard of Oz himself.

Good Witch: It's always best to start at the beginning - and all you do is follow the Yellow Brick Road.

Trishiee: Follow the Yellow Brick Road. Follow the Yellow Brick Road????


Munchkins:
Follow the Yellow Brick Road. Follow the Yellow Brick Road. Follow, follow, follow, follow, Follow the Yellow Brick Road. Follow the Yellow Brick, Follow the Yellow Brick, Follow the Yellow Brick Road.You're off to see the Wizard, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz.
You'll find he is a whiz of a Wiz! If ever a Wiz! there was.
If ever oh ever a Wiz! there was The Wizard of Oz is one because,
Because, because, because, because, because.
Because of the wonderful things he does.
You're off to see the Wizard. The Wonderful Wizard of Oz.

So off I went, following the yellow brick road. Then I encounter my first friend, the Scarecrow (who looked like my squishy a.k.a Leeno)

Squishy: Oh, I could tell you why The ocean's near the shore.
I could think of things I never thunk before.
And then I'd sit, and think some more.
I would not be just a nothin' my head all full of stuffin'
My heart all full of pain.
I would dance and be merry, life would be a ding-a-derry,
If I only had a brain.

Trish: I know who can help you... I'm going to see the wizard of OZ

Squish: Look - I won't be any trouble, because I don't eat a thing, and I won't try to manage things, because I can't think. Won't you take me with you?
Trish:Of course, I will.
Squish:Hooray! We're off to see a Wizard!


Off we went, following the yellow brick road. Everything was great, till we stopped near a house where a rusty man was lying down, a Tin Man (who looked like my friend Maddox Keynes)

Squishy & I help him up, and gave his rusty parts some oil so he can move...

Maddox:Me - e, me - e-, My- mmm-my, my, my, my goodness. I can talk again!
Trish: Well, you're perfect now.
Maddox: Perfect? Oh - bang on my chest if you think I'm perfect. Go ahead - bang on it!
It's empty. The tinsmith forgot to give me a heart. All hollow.

Trish (looks at Squish): Well, we're going to see the Wizard of OZ maybe he can help you too..

Maddox: Oh, okay!! I wanna go..............
Trish (looking at them):To Oz?
Squish and Mad:To Oz!

Off we went again, following the yellow brick road. We entered the forest, it was scary, we could hear the distant sounds of wild animals-

Trishiee: Do you think there could be wild animals in here?
Maddox: Perhaps.
Squish: Even ones that, that eat... straw?
Maddox: Some, but mostly lions and tigers and bears.
Trish: Lions?
Squish: And tigers?
Maddox: And bears.
TRish: Oh my!
TRishiee: Lions and tigers and bears! Oh, my!


Speaking of Lions, one jumped out and scared the bejesus out of us, a Lion (who looked like my buddy, James Ray Desmond)


James: I am King of the Forest (ROAR) who are you? (ROAR)
Squish: I am a Scarecrow
Maddox: Tin Man
Trish: A girl

James: HA HA (cough) HA

his shadow beside him grows and James thinks it's a monster

James: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP

Trish: Your Majesty, If you were King, you wouldn't be afraid of anything?
James:Not nobody, not nohow!
Squish:Not even a rhinocerous?
Trish: How about a hippopotamus?
James:Why, I'd trash him from top to bottomamus!
Trish:Supposin' you met an elephant?
James:I'd wrap him up in cellophant!
Squish:What if it were a brontosaurus?
James: I'd show him who was King of the Forest!
Trish: but you're scared?
James: uhuh nyahahaha, I need courage
Trish (lightbulb moment): You can come with us Mr. Lion err... your majesty. We are going to see the Wizard of Oz.... You don't have to be sad anymore, he will give you courage.
James:Yeh, it's sad, believe me, Missy, When you're born to be a sissy. Without the vim and verve.But I could show my prowess, be a lion not a mou-ess
If I only had the nerve.
I'm afraid there's no denyin' I'm just a dandelion,
A fate I don't deserve.
I'd be brave as a blizzard....
Maddox: I'd be gentle as a lizard....
Squish:I'd be clever as a gizzard....
Trish: If the Wizard is a Wizard who will serve.
Squish:Then I'm sure to get a brain,
Maddox: a heart
Trish:a home
James: the nerve!
All: TO OZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



So, there we arrive the magical and very GREEN city of Oz. We walk down the majestic streets of the Emerald city. It is beautiful, but we weren't there to see the sights. We were there for the Wizard, so after locating his rather huge domicile...

James: Wait a minute, Fellows. I was just thinking. I really don't want to see the Wizard this much. I'd better wait for you outside.
Squish: What's the matter?
Maddox: Oh, he's just a scared again.
Trish: Don't you know the Wizard's going to give you some courage?
James: I'd be too scared to ask him for it.
TRish: Well then, we'll ask him for you.
James: I'd sooner wait outside.
Trish: Why? Why?
James: Because I'm still scared.

The three of them drag James into the Wizard's domain..

Wizard: I am Oz, the Great and Powerful Oz knows why you have come. Step forward, Tin Man!
Maddox:Ohhhhh!
Wizard:You dare to come to me for a heart, do you?
And you, Scarecrow, have the affrontery to ask for a brain! And you - Lion!!
Well, the beneficient Oz has every intention of granting your requests!
But first, bring me the broomstick of the Witch of the West.


The group was given a direct threat by the Witch as they started the journey... She was going to hurt anyone who was going to help Trishiee.
Wicked Witch of the West: Helping the little lady along are you, my fine gentlemen? Well stay away from her, or I'll stuff a mattress with you! And you, I'll make you into a beehive. Here Scarecrow, want to play ball?

Squish: I'm not afraid of her! I'll see you get safely to the Wizard now, whether I get a brain or not. Stuff a mattress with me. Ha!
Maddox: I'll see you reach the Wizard, whether I get a heart or not. Beehive, bah! Let her try and make a beehive out of me!
Trish: Oh, you're the best friends anybody ever had. And it's funny, but I feel as if I'd known you all the time, but I couldn't have, could I?
Squish: I don't see how. You weren't around when I was stuffed and sewn together, were you?
Maddox: And I was standing over there, rusting for the longest time.
Trish: Still, I wish I could remember, but I guess it doesn't matter anyway. We know each other now, don't we?
Squish: That's right.
Maddox: We do.
James: LETS GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


So, off they went to seek out the Witch in her Castle

Trish:It's the witch!
Wicked Witch (giving orders to her men): bring me that girl and her dog. Do as you like with the others,
but I want her alive and unharmed!
Wicked Witch (holding Spudee): What a nice little dog. And you, my dear. What an unexpected pleasure. It's so kind of you to visit me in my loneliness.
Trish: What are you going to do with my dog! Give him back to me!
Wicked Witch:All in good time, my little pretty - all in good time.
Trish: Run, Spudee- run!
Wicked Witch:Catch him, you fool!
Trish: Run, Spud, run! Run, Spudee, run! He got away! He got away!
Wicked Witch:Ohhh! Which is more than you will! Drat you and your dog!
You've been more trouble to me than you're worth, one way and another -
but it'll soon be over now!
Trish:I'm frightened, I'm frightened!

Maddox:Look! There's Spudee! Where'd he come from?
Squish:Why, don't you see? He's come to take us to Trishiee.
Maddox: Oh -
Squish:Come on, fellows!
James:What's that! What's that waaaaaaaaaaaaah?
Squish:That's the castle of the Wicked Witch. Trishiee's in that awful place!
Maddox: Oh, I hate to think of her in there. We've got to get her out! waaaah are those monkeys?


Winkies (army of the Witch)
Ooo - eeeee - hoo! Yooo - ho! Ooo - eeeee - hoo! Yooo - ho!
Squish:I've got a plan how to get in there. And you're going to lead us.
James: All right. I'll go in there for Trishiee - Wicked Witch or no Wicked Witch -
guards or no guards - I'll tear 'em apart. Ohhh! I may not come out alive but I'm going in there.
There's only one thing I want you fellas to do.
Maddox and Squish: What's that?
James: Talk me out of it, nyahahahaha.

Winkies: Ooo - eeeee - hoo! Yooo - ho! Ooo - eeeee - hoo! Yooo - ho!
Squish: Trish, are you in there?
James: It's us!
Trish: Yes, it's me! She's locked me in!
James: Listen, fellas. It's her. We gotta get her out! Open this door!
Trish: Hurry, please, hurry!
Squish: Hurry, we've got no time to lose!
Wicked Witch: Ha, ha, ha! Going so soon? I wouldn't hear of it. Why, my little party's just beginning. Ha, ha, ha, eh, eh!Ring around the Rosey! A pocket full of spears! Well,
the last to go will see the first three go before her! And your mangy little dog, too!
How about a little fire, Scarecrow? Huh?
Squish: No! No! No! No! Help! I'm burning! I'm burning! I'm burning!

Trishiee finds a bucket of water.

Wicked Witch: No, don't throw that water! Ohhhhh! You cursed brat! Look what you've done! I'm melting! Melting!

Leader of Winkies: She's - she's dead. You've killed her. Hail to Dorothy! The Wicked Witch is dead!
Winkies: Hail! Hail to Trishiee! The Wicked Witch is dead!
Trish: Now we can go back to the Wizard and tell him the Wicked Witch is dead!

So after a rather insane battle with the Witch, Trishiee defeats her by giving her a bath... and well, she melts. The triumphant gang return to the Wizard.

Trish: Please, sir. We've done what you told us. We brought you the broomstick of the Wicked Witch of the West. We melted her!
Wizard of Oz: Oh, you liquidated her, eh? Very resourceful!

He gives each one of them what they ask for:
A brain for Scarecrow (SQUISH)

Wizard of Oz: Why, anybody can have a brain. That's a very mediocre commodity. Every pusillanimous creature that crawls on the Earth or slinks through slimy seas has a brain. Back where I come from, we have universities, seats of great learning, where men go to become great thinkers. And when they come out, they think deep thoughts and with no more brains than you have. But they have one thing you haven't got: a diploma. . Therefore, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Universitartus Committiartum E Pluribus Unum, I hereby confer upon you the honorary degree of ThD.
Squish: ThD?
Wizard of Oz: That's... Doctor of Thinkology.
Squish: The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side. Oh joy! Rapture! I got a brain! How can I ever thank you enough?
Wizard of Oz: You can't.


A heart for Tinman (MADDOX)
Wizard of Oz: As for you, my galvanized friend, you want a heart. You don't know how lucky you are not to have one. Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable. Maddox: But I still want one.
Wizard of Oz: Back where I come from there are men who do nothing all day but good deeds. They are called phil....er.....phil...er...er....good-deed-doers and their hearts are no bigger than yours, but they have one thing you haven't got! A testimonial! Therefore, in consideration of your kindness, I take pleasure at this time in presenting you with a small token of our esteem and affection. And remember, my sentimental friend, that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others.
Maddox: Super!!!!!

Courage for The Cowardly Lion (JAMES)

Wizard of Oz: As for you my fine friend, you are a victim of disorganized thinking. You are under the unfortunate delusion that simply because you run away from danger you have no courage! You are confusing courage with wisdom. Back where I come from we have men who are called heroes. Once a year they take their fortitude out of mothballs and parade it down the main street of the city. And they have no more courage than you have. But - they have one thing that you haven't got! A medal!! Therefore, for meritorious conduct, extraordinary valor, conspicuous bravery against wicked witches, I award you the Triple Cross.You are now a member of the Legion of Courage!
James: Shucks, folks, I'm speechless. NYAHaha Ha! -__-'


Maddox: Oh, Oh, it ticks! Listen! Look, it ticks!
James: Read - read what my medal says. Courage! Ain't it the truth!
Trish:Oh - oh they're all wonderful.
Squish: Hey, what about Trishiee?

The Wizard boards his Hot Air Balloon (he forgot about me though).

Trishiee: Come back! Come back! Don't leave without me! Come back!
Wizard of Oz: I can't come back! I don't know how it works! Good-bye folks!
Trishiee: how am I going to get home now????????

The Good Witch appears....


Good Witch: Why you had the power all along Trishiee.

Trishiee: I have?

Good Witch: those ruby red shoes you are wearing is your ticket home... You just click your heels together and say: There's no place like home....

Squish: Then why didn't you tell her before?
Good Witch:Because she wouldn't have believed me. She had to learn it for herself.
Maddox: What have you learned, Trishiee?
Trishiee: Well, I - I think that it - that it wasn't enough just to want to see
My Mom and Dad. And that it's that - if I ever go looking for my heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own backyard, because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with. Is that right?
Good Witch: That's all it is!

Trish: OH my!!!!! yey! (clap, clap) I can now go home...

She turns to her friends and sees their sad faces...

Trish: Goodbye, Maddy. Oh, don't cry! You'll rust so dreadfully. Here's your oil can.
Maddox: Now I know I've got a heart, 'cause it's breaking...
Trish: Goodbye, Lion. I know it isn't right, but I'm going to miss the way you used to hollar for help before you found your courage.
James: I never would've found it if it hadn't been for you..waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh.
Trishiee: [to Scarecrow] I think I'm going to miss you most of all.




That's when my dream ends.......

All I wanted was to get away from that Wicked Witch! But I guess I will have to keep moving forward and not let the presence of the Wicked Witch (or any wicked being for that matter) to stop me from living my life. After all I have a very SMART, LOVING, and COURAGEOUS bunch of friends who will save the day for me, and when everything else fails, I guess I will have to buy myself some ruby red shoes (wink).


sources: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0032138/quotes
http://www.stlyrics.com/t/thewizardofoz.htm

A Hallmark Moment

People have learned and shared fairytales...
Stories about how a dashing Prince and a fair Lady fell in love.

Well, I got a great story to tell, and it's about you and me.

I wasn't really waiting for someone dreamy to sweep me off my feet... Still, you came my dear Prince... And saved me from living in loneliness.

Every time we are together, I discover the different side of you- A Clown, who always tries to cheer me up when I'm sad. A Poet, who whispers sweet loving words to my ear. An Artist who inspires me to appreciate the beauty of life, even in simple things.

You are truly amazing... You make me believe I'm in a world full of fantasies.

No matter how much more I learn about you, there's one thing that never changes... When I look at you, I still see that noble Prince who saved me, and turned my life into a fairy tale.

And every time a page is turned, the more I LOVE YOU.

Aboo SB

Living Vicariously: The Threesome

Hello Fabulous Readers,

Yes, it is of note that I (Esereth Rageni Amari) have been noticeably absent for the loooongest time (dare you tell me that you know how long I have been absent? hmmm... I don't even know, 2 - 3 weeks?) Anyhoo, isn't our title today rather scandalizing? Ah... such dirty minds, do clean up your craniums, because the tale for today doesn't have anything to do with three people in bed doing something rather naughty. However, two out of the three of the people that I will talk about ARE rather naughty- I wonder who hmmmm... If you recall, most of our adventures are about the famous DD (Dynamic Duo) Savannah Red and Maddox Keynes, but alas! our colorful and lovable duo have been torn apart by fate. Vanity Nexus has assigned Mad to star in an awesome movie in Australia, while Sav has been busy with her journalistic duties in the jolly good London (she must be covering a Harry Potter story, hmm....) Two different timezones!!!!! (sigh) As of late, the DD have been exchanging emails, and Sav has been spotted sitting in a London cafe with a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of her lips as she reads the emails on her VAIO Z from Mad. (side comment: Savvy has also been spotted sporting newly colored locks and rather fetching outfits, smashing really!!!) Email from Mad:

hey savvy - i so want to see your new look, hey are you coming with us
this friday? fly over to Aussie land after your shift, you can meet us...
that is if it wouldn't be too inconvenient for your part to take the
company jet.

you take care of yourself and keep me posted with the things going ok,.
send my regards to your Leeno (wink). i miss the cookies... the sumptuous
cookies made out of love..

Is there another collective noun to use, to describe how much I miss
you? Early this morning, James Ray Desmond and I chatted and I did mention to him
that I miss you so much. The talks and a lot more from you my dearest
Savvy. It is so flattering to know that I come next to Leeno (as your
she-man friend. Laughing!)

Ei - I bought a new slippers (orange in color) and its havaianas, why
not! (but sad to know my credit card didn't work on me - so I opted to
use cash) God must have reasons for this because God knew I didn't want to use
my credit card anymore but knowing that I cant settle not unless I can
have the things I want, he let me use my monies instead, and now - I am
MC Hammer broke again! (boo-hoo!)

im parking here and hope to hear from you more and see you around.

hugs and loves,
maddox keynes
xoxo

Email from Sav:

Yes, it has been cast in gold that you are my number two guy (lady pal) haha you are my best budlet :)
I miss you loads. I do hope that we will be able to go out- blast! I wish I could bring the jet already hmph!
patience is a virtue (sigh).

Oooh you have new slippers? cool!!!!! Glad to know that you are enjoying your job,
fabulous folks like us need not sweat the small stuff in life- it might bring wrinkles
to our immaculate faces (gasp!!!!).

As for James Ray D. he has been my ever vigilant sidekick on my trips
in downtown London, this threesome (uhem... the three of us)
should re-unite, coz it is sooo tres' lonely without you.

You better not forget about your buddy Savvy, I would sooo go into a quiet
seclusion if I find out that the memory of the other half of the DD is
gathering dust in the shelf in your heart (ha ha drama!!!).


I really do miss the Mad and Sav adventures (sigh) I am hearing cricket
sounds from my heart..(sigh again). Hmm... We really must plan our
come-back to the world- any tips????

Don't starve yourself darling, you might become quite a boor- hunger makes
beasts out of all of us. Smile Mad, you are too sexy to diet (laughs)

Kisses
Sav


Ah... isn't it rather tragic that the two of them have been separated? But on to the threesome part.
You see, when the DD were still working together on the same big shot super star client for VN, they
also shared that shift with most of the VN gang (who usually gathered for lunch at 9:30 am) Sadly, they have
also been sent off to different assignments. Anyway, during some crazy moments of the DD adventures somehow
there came a time that James Ray Desmond became a part of the team, ergo they are now a threesome
(or we would call it a trio).

To borrow a very memorable quote from the movie: Casablanca:

"Louis, I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship"

Rick (played by: Humphrey Bogart) says this to the Captain as the movie ends. It is said to be one of
the greatest quotes in movie history. I'm sure none of you have seen this movie since it came out in the
year 1942! I'm not ancient, I just happen to appreciate movies in the past. You know, those black and
white type movies? Ah... classics.

Digressing aside, That is how Casablanca ended, and I'm borrowing it to mark the beginning of the THREESOME.

"This is the start of a beautiful friendship...."

This is how it happened:

Sav and Mad were enjoying an online game on www.dressmeup.com wherein you basically dress up
a girl in all sorts of outfits (there are also fairies and mermaids - you'll get it later). So there they were, enjoying
the whole competition on who was better at make-up and wardrobe when for some inconceivable and utterly adorable
reason- James asks if he could join.

Spotted:

James Ray Desmond (JD) playing dress up!!!
So, the three took part in a healthy competition. Mechanics: Dress up the girl according to the
theme specified by the chosen judge (Miranda K), you will be judged in make-up application, choice in clothing, and accessories.
Off they went to their separate stations...

Mad (the ever fabulous one) won the first round, much to James' chagrin and Savvy's total amusement. It seems the heterosexual man
was miffed that his girl was not dubbed as the best dressed. Albeit, she was rather lovely- she was just TOO PINK. haha
Second round went to Sav, again, James' forehead was furrowed in vexation "Mine is the best!!!"

The DD teased JD over and over again whenever he lost to one of them- but he had the last laugh, because he
won during the dress up the fairy game- this time, it was the DD who were rather surprised. It was well noted that
JD was totally pleased.

Kudos JD, men who take part in online dress up games can be rather adorable (and you tried sooo hard too), but for you,
I would draw that line when you are told to actually put on the dresses though (laugh).

Sadly, that was the last day that the three of them were together, and it seems Sav and Mad will never get
to see each other, lucky for JD, he gets to see Sav and Mad separately- since he has to fly over to their respective
areas for certain assignments.

Is this the end of the DD? Of course not!!!!!

It is rather the beginning of THE THREESOME...

Two and a half men (ha ha) and a girl


TTFN

A Love That Destroyed A Kingdom.......

"I will protect you my lady" he said and Gwenevere stared at this errant knight wondering why her heart skipped a beat. She promised her heart to Arthur, that alone should mean something, a vow was said, rings were exchanged, and yet... one look into Lancelot's eyes and everything was forgotten....



He offered his hand for her to take, up she went on his marvelous steed. Ignoring the strong arms that enveloped her, she stared at the road ahead.

Lancelot guided is white steed, ignoring the smell of her hair. She was right in front of him, riding with him for this long journey to Camelot- it was torture. "I swore my fealty to the king, to God and Country my loyalty stands, but one smile from this beautiful creature and I long to throw caution into the wind".

"Thank you for saving me knight." he heard her whisper. He answered, "It is my duty, my lady..." His horse gave the reins a shake as if sensing his urge to say what he kept inside. "The king will reward you handsomely" she said. A wan smile escaped his lips, "My only reward is to see that you are safe and sound, my Queen...".

After an hour riding the Queen requested for a rest. He stared into the placid lake in front of him, questioning his heart. A giggle escaped from her lips like the sound of tinkling bells. He turned his eyes to her and held his breath- "curse that smile!"

"What's the matter?" she asked. He turned away from her, "Nothing..." he answered. He felt her hand on his shoulder. "Lancelot?". It was the first time he heard her say his name. If only it were some other girl, but then, it wouldn't be her... He turned to face her again and saw the questioning look she had. "You're beautiful..." he thought, and was surprised to see her blush, unaware that he had said that thought out loud.

"I can't feel this way..." Gwenevere thought as she stared at her relfection on the mirror. "He said, I'm beautiful...."

In the courtyard. Arthur was staring at a very lost Lancelot. "You saved my wife...". Lancelot glanced up, dismissing his thoughts. "It was my duty sire....". "You are one of my greatest knights Lancelot and-" Arthur said, "a cherished friend". Lancelot winced. "You have made the kingdom happy by bringing the Queen back, you also have my deepest gratitude".

Gwenevere stared out from her window at the pair, her eyes never leaving the knight's dispiriting face. Memories of her abduction haunted her, voices of the men who roughly tied her wrists together echoed in her mind, but perhaps the most vivid memory was of Lancelot's bellow of anger as he charged into her captor's camp blanketed by darkness with only a lone flame to illuminate his fiery face as he swooped down to save her.

It was a long journey to Camelot, a journey filled with poignant moments that made her heart ache. They talked, they laughed, they event fought along the way- something was amiss, she thought one day as she was roused by Lancelot's heavy sigh- he was staring at her, with the same sad brown eyes that looked up at her at that very moment when the thought occured.... Arthur saw this and looked up as well. It was a very long and sleepless night.


A kiss was all it will take to break the spell- he thought, entering the garden. A kiss will free me from this labyrinth of insanity that has her face plastered on every wall, her laugher echoing in the silence, and her eyes burning me with its intensity...

A kiss will free me from this horrible infatuation- she thought, watering her Roses. She shook her head to banish the thought, I cannot have feelings for him.

"My lady..." those words were spoken in a whisper, that affected her so much, he should've just screamed out loud, it wouldn't have made any difference. She turned, there he was the very object of her brooding thoughts willed by the fates to torment her.

"I must leave..." he says, staring at the ground. "You are safe now..."

Panic wells up in her heart, "Leave??? You can't, the King won't let you..."

He looks up at her. "The King won't let me?" then added with all the courage he had, "Or is it you who won't let me leave?"

She doesn't answer and casts her eyes to the ground. He approaches her and takes her chin with his thumb and index finger. "I won't go, if you tell me not to..."

She turns away from him. "I can't say that..."

"Then, I must go..."

"Wait..."

Without a word, not a single word he takes her in his arms and kisses her. Expecting her to fight him, or at least push him away, he was only surprised to hear her sigh... a heavenly sound followed by the sharp gasp.

They let go of each other just in time to see the look on King Arthur's face....