A tale of Coffee mugs and YouTube watching

Dear Reader,

(as if you have the time to peruse the contents of my blog, but nevertheless, if a "bored" individual out there happens to be curious enough to read... then, enjoy)

Let me start with this, 5am. There, what does that mean exactly? Well, It could mean a lot of things, but for me, it only holds one meaning, 5am = work. Yes, that's the time I go to work. Everyday (or at least for two days now) I've been roused by the sound of David Cook's voice (my alarm tone) if that is any indication that my "admiration" for the bloke has not bloomed into a strange case of "stalking" well, feel free to report me to the proper authorities- more on him later. Where was I? Ah... 5am. Strange time of the day actually, when I open my eyes the sky is still pretty dark, I change and go about my regular routine yada yada, when I get out there it is... Sunrise, now I'm not going to deliver an allocution about the wonders and majesty of the sun rising from the darkness and what not- simply put, I look at it and think: "GAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH, it burns" - yeah, that simple. Alright, the truth is, I get all maudlin and stuff, but I'm not about to drone about the sun K? There, when I arrive the office (greeting the graveyard shift folks) I plant myself on a comfy chair and- now this is the part where I turn my head to the left, then right and confess my insane addiction to watching David Cook (hereafter will be known as DC) videos on YouTube.
Now, I'm not the single-white-female nutcase alright? Let's just get that out of the way, I-am-not-psychotic or depraved in any way. It's just I have a "thing" for men who are, in the words of Dave Cook himself: "a word-nerd". You see, even before that description was coined, I spent much of my life being a closet "word nerd". I dunno, I suppose I'm fascinated with words and enjoy stringing them in sentences, or just inserting them into regular conversations, much to the sheer vexation of the people I converse with (I guess that explains why I don't have many friends HA HA).
Yes, when I found out that DC was a crossword nut as well as a word-nerd a lightbulb clicked in my head and I was like: "Wow I'm not alone... AND oh my god! he's awesome" now, the singing voice is a plus by the way (I also have a thing for rocker types, kinda like Johnny Depp - but he's another story)
Yeah, I dig guys with brains (that function properly)

i.e can form coherent sentences, add numbers sans using his fingers (or toes), loves to read, and has a penchant for debating philosophical ideas- in short, he has to make Aristotle, Plato, Galileo, Einstein, and etc look like buffoons (Yeah, a being of supreme intelligence).

Technically, I'm not stalking David Cook... I am amusing myself, no, bolstering the growing notion that there is hope for the male species- if that wasn't proven by my father and the incomparable genius that I call- Ray Leonard, then David Cook certainly did the male population a favor in my book- this marks the end of my DC rant, explaning the YouTube watching part.

On to Coffe mugs. I have this cute lion coffe mug that has served as my ally against the dreaded assault of lethargy and from dropping into a drooling slumber in the presence of officemates (Thank you inventor of Coffee- wait, God invented coffee right?- so do I thank the genius who harvested the beans and roasted them?)
Digressing aside, this is my life as of late. Oh and I WORK by the way, what do I do? Well, I work?- I don't intend to give a detailed inventory on what I actually do... Why? I'd like to keep my work a secret (I'm a spy no, I'm a ninja, no, I'm BATMAN! err girl -> this is the coffee talking... O_O
Am I rambling? I suppose I am... I've just handed off the headphones to Irene in order to cease my "stalking mode"
Oh and I learned a new word today: juxtapose. I aim to learn at least five new words a day- must keep the ol' noggin alert and uh... smart?

What do I do now??? O_o twitch, twitch o_O

mental note: must not drink more than two cups of coffee

Adieu my readers (if there are any)
I hope you enjoyed my aimless ramblings- in the words of Maximus (Gladiator)

"Are you not entertained? Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here? "

You're reading this to allay boredom correct? Well, I live to entertain people with my odd humor and droll comments (at least I think they are) and I hope I have given you a proper glimpse of my twisted psyche... Do come again when I ramble about some other experience.

mental note: stop talking (typing) and narrating experience as if addressing an audience

All the world is a stage ladies and gents (here I go again) I am merely one of the many thespians who relishes the chance to showcase my... brilliance, or lack thereof... HA HA

Where am I going with this? can somebody yell cut already? Sheesh

-> this is definitely the coffee talking

in the words of the MASK: "Somebody stop me"

Really, somebody, stop me... My brain's pilot has stepped out and some monkey has taken over and decided to blog about THIS. A monkey draped in many layers of clothing (coz the office is freezing cold and the people here are penguins or polar bears- oblivious or impervious to the numbing cold... really guys IT IS COLD i can barely type over here)

-> Ah... this is the cold talking?

Hmmm........ must stop now, fingers going numb.

trishiee OUT... O_O

Emancipation of Trishiee

"Welcome to the real world", she said to me
Condescendingly
Take a seat
Take your life
Plot it out in black and white
Well I never lived the dreams of the prom kings
And the drama queens
I'd like to think the best of me
Is still hiding
Up my sleeve..."
No Such Thing- John Mayer.


Welcome to the real world indeed, kudos for me I have a job! I'll be starting on Monday...
Don't hold back the applause people, I know the parents have been waiting in bated breath for me to get my derriere off the couch and onto a comfy office chair. Well, wish granted. In the words of Hiro Nakamura "Yatah!".
Oooh many thanks to my dear, dear friend Irene- daughter of Zeus, God of Mt. Olympus, for moving Heaven and Earth to get me this job- your powers never cease to amaze me Rene, too bad we have different schedules. By the time I'm off, you'll be coming in... bring me a pillow hahaha!
So, yeah, this is it people... Trishiee has left the mundane confines of her hermit cave and will embark on a maiden voyage into the new world of employment... Oooh I'm not a bum anymore.

Dear X

I suppose this serves as a "Dear John letter" haha it's a little 
too late to give this, but hey, I've postponed the act of releasing
the words, so here it is, closure...

Dear _______,

The other day I heard this song and a thought entered my mind, unbidden. So it has 
been a while since the memory of you has crossed my mind. Ha! It has been what? 
three or four years since we last spoke, I can't say that we parted on good terms, actually,
I think we just parted, period. 
I must say, I have done a lot of growing up in the years of your absence, not that you
contributed to any change in my life other than disenchanting me from the idea of finding
"Mr Perfect" (actually I have, I thought you ruined it for me) I suppose this is a little bit
 of gratuitous criticism thrown your way for all the times I spent pondering on the idiocy 
of the male population. (no offense)
So, what do I have to say to you? I have contemplated the idea of sending you a detailed
inventory of your faults and transgressions in the short amount of time that I spent in
 your company... but that would be unfair I suppose- in all honesty you weren't that 
horrible. Just wildly juvenile, intoxicated with the idea of your youth, the open doors 
of the world and everything it offered for you. Gallivanting around like some pompous 
Casanova- Debauchery was your favorite pastime. 
I am going to step down from my pulpit now, I forgot that I'm not doing this to deliver
an allocution of your rather colorful past. Why am I doing this again? Ah closure...

Alright, thank you. There, I said it.
If it weren't for your blatant manhandling of my impressionable uh..
heart? (okay, let's say childish mind) I wouldn't have learned the greatest lesson that 
allowed me to be more wary of individuals like you. Who pride themselves with their
prowess in deluding unsuspecting females like myself, into falling for your rather primitive
charm. Yes, seriously, do you get your technique from some "How Win Her Over" book
that has been passed down from one  generation to the next?, because in my humble
 opinion, your technique lacks finesse.  "No" doesn't secretly mean "Yes" and "Go away"
 is not code for "Take me I'm yours". 
Again, thank you, from the bottom of my heart. For a while, it was  like I was drowning 
and now, I've finally come up for air. I've grown up, and I have discarded my fanciful
notions of finding "Mr Right". Let me sum up my new take on men, with the following
quotation. 

Give me a man who is man enough to give himself just to the woman 
who is worth him. 
If that woman were me I would love him alone and forever.
(Casanova 2005) 

Regrettably, that man wasn't you.  I can't  speak for that man that you have 
become NOW, I'm describing the man I knew back THEN. 
You were kind, funny, charming, and caring. You did a lot of good things, and a few
rotten deeds, but perhaps the most appalling thing you did was to underestimate me...
 I nipped the farce in the bud, before it bloomed into the titanic fiasco I knew it would 
eventually become. I was smart enough to walk away. Oddly enough, that's when you
decided to "show a leg" and "jump through flaming hoops" tsk tsk.
Men... what is it about realizing the value of something when it isn't in your possession
anymore? Oh, and the whole wanting-something-you-can't-have. Is it just some 
depraved game to you? 
Perhaps not all of you, just the ones who are late in the evolutionary process. 
The ones who still think they have to  swing their clubs in the air to show their 
superiority and drag women by their hair to their caves. 
 
Anyway, that was ancient history. In the words of Neyo:

The mistake i made is clear

(we never shoulda been together)

Thats the reason youre not here

(I know that I can do much better)

Not a single salty tear

Not a feeling in my chest

Baby im feeling no stress

Im too fly to be depressed...


I hear you have someone new now- take care of her. 

 
Oh, and here's the song I heard by the way... 


We've been here before
We'll be here again so go on and rest your head
Before you lose it again
We're leaning on each other
Or at least I can pretend
That we didn't lose it all again
It could have been different
It could have all been the same
But now I'm standing at your front door, singing,

When everything's the same
And nothing ever changes
Will you fall back into me, oh
You see, everything's estranged
A million empty faces
So will you fall back into me?

Congratulations
You left me a little jaded and rejected
And so I lost it again
You chew me up, you throw away
As I continue to pretend
That we didn't lose it all again
I guess it's never different
I guess it's all the same
So now I'm bloodied by my fist, clenched, swinging

When everything's the same
And nothing ever changes
Will you fall back into me, oh
You see, everything's estranged
A million empty faces
So will you fall back into me?

I was a name across your lips
It's time to spit me out
I play the game; when my heart rips
It's time to hear me out
(Never do without)

When everything's the same
And nothing ever changes
Will you fall back into me
See, everything's estranged
A million empty faces
So will you fall back into me?

(Will you fall
We'll be here again
So go on and rest your head
Before you lose it again)

We're leaning on each other
Or at least I can pretend
That we didn't lose it all again, all again
Lose it all again

Song Title: Fall Back Into Me
Artist: David Cook 

I'm Back

Alright, after my loooooooong hiatus from the blogging world, here I am back with a vengeance. Just two days ago I had my first (and second) job interview in the company where I previously had my internship. It was like being in front of a firing squad- not that it was unpleasant in any way. Au contraire, it was actually rather interesting, but i likened the experience to being in front of a firing squad on account of the fact that the interviewer/s were firing no many questions at me (which usually occurs in any job interview) that I half expected to drop dead the moment the interview ended. ha ha. It was odd being under that much scutiny, it felt like I was some specimen being dissected, and my parts were being examined under a high-powered microscope- I wonder if they saw into my soul????
Hmm... The first interview went rather well, I was told that they would contact me in 2 weeks time if I qualified for the next round, or something like that. A hour later, I was surprised to hear that I was scheduled for a second interview that evening. My first thought: "Wow that was quick. I guess I did something right..."
The second interview was amusing. When I was ushered into the interview room I thought the interviewer would already be there, she was not. So for ten minutes I had the most insane moment second-guessing as to why I was alone in that room with 4 chairs. I sat on the chair close to the door, in front of me was a table with a telephone on it, behind the table was another chair. There was another chair to my left and another chair to the right of the chair in front of me.
In came the conspiracy theories. "Why are there 4 chairs in this room? Is it some perverse personality test to see where I would sit? Should I sit on the chair that is closer to the interviewer's chair or should I stay put on the chair I am sitting on?" the chairs weren't the only objects that made me nuts.
"Why is there a phone in here? Is this going to be an interview over the phone?" I groaned inwardly. "My powers of persuation are at a disadvantage with handheld communication devices..."
Another five minutes passed and my neurotic mind went on overdrive. "Is there a camera in here? Are they watching me, testing me if I am assertive enough to demmand where my interviewer is????"
I was about to go out when my interviewer arrived and quickly apologized for keeping me waiting- so much for my conpiracy theories! I have to admit, I did go a little nuts in that room for a while.
The second interview felt like I was like a dog on a dogshow, perched on a table with my parts being examined- my teeth, tail, feet, fur, eyes, stance, privates? (not sure what they inspect, but I see the judges groping the privates of male dogs, apparently if the male dog does not have testicles, he will be disqualified from entering the show) . Digressing aside, the interviewer fired questions and presented future situations that I might encounter on the job that made me balk at the idea and run the other way. Perhaps, sensing fear, she went for the kill and asked me if I believe myself to be capable of handling situations like that that required meticulous inspection and thoroughness. I faltered a bit, under her intense scrutiny, but managed to assure her that I have been drilled all my life about organization and thoroughness AND my obsessive-compulsive nature is just the thing that will help me get every job done.
All in all, it wasn't much of a fiasco, but I shouldn't have allowed the woman to corner me with her questions like a trapped wild animal staring into the barel of a shotgun.
Oh well, to quote my teacher "I'll have to charge that to experience"
I thought I handled that interview rather well, it felt disconcerting having to drone on and on about myself, but I suppose that's the "product" I'm supposed to sell to my future employers.

"Hi I'm Trish, I work hard, I rarely slack off, I love challenges and I have an insatiable thirst for knowledge. I work better when I'm alone, but working with a team equally stimulates me. I pass assigned paperwork before the deadline and I even obsess about the things I have to accomplish in my sleep. I love being the best, I want to work for the best, and I expect to recieve only the best things life has to offer me- other than that I'm quite willing to work for food" haha

It's a bit nauseating to keep talking about myself. Yes, I am competent. Yes, I think, no scratch that, I know I can handle that. I mean, I'm not Einstein or anything, but I'm sure I have enough intelligence to handle that- I don't have jellybeans for brains if that is what you're implying....

C'est la vie. I can only hope that I didn't make a total cake out of myself during that interview. I handled it with as much finesse and poise. I half expected someone with a crown, sash, and bouquet to show up- felt like a question and answer portion for a beauty pageant, that's for sure.

I'm not mocking the interview process by the way. I'm mocking my experiece and how my twisted mind chose to describe the expereience. Perhaps it has addled my brain in the process. SIGH. It was fun. I hope I won't have to repeat that and land myself a job that I can attack with enthusiasm and the determination of a Olympic athlete. Then again, if I don't get the Gold for my stellar performance during that interview, then I shall have to soldier on... I wonder if I can find a job that caters to my penchant for writing?
Hmm... So the Guidance Counselor dreams have been shot down mercilessly by the forces of fate... I'm undaunted by fate's deflection, but I'll have to work on that by earning a Master's degree before having the courage to apply for that position again.

So here I am waiting in bated breath to be put out of my misery... Did I get the job or not? In 2 weeks time I will get my answer....

A Love that will Last

Ever been in love with love? I have. Well, I was circa 1999- 2003. I thought I had it figured out, believed myself to have some sort of Ph.D when it came to explaining how it worked. Silly me. It was juvenile to think that because I watched Sleeping Beauty wake up from a kiss (hopefully she didn't have morning breath), Ariel being able to walk on land (did she smell like a fish?), Snow white roused from her "food poisoning", Cinderella correcting her footwear drama and the like- I thought, I knew how love worked. Ha ha. Fairy Tales only talk about "Happily Ever After" they never really touch the subject of what happens after "Happily Ever After"- makes you think right?.
The folks at Disney finally got their facts right when they made "Enchanted". Yes, Prince Charming may be dreamy, but that is how he is packaged. He's an action figure complete with the right accessories: the horse, the sword, the velvet fabric and gold detailing on his outfit, the boots, gorgeous face, bumbling sidekick / servant- the singing voice is a plus. By the way, didn't anybody ever think that Prince Charming may just be a dude with a hero complex? I mean, hello???? saving damsels from dragons, trolls and what other creature made to torment "helpless" maidens... I bet the guy gets a high from kicking butt, not from saving the pretty lady.
And what's with the "helpless" maiden part anyway? I'm sorry, it's not because I'm a girl or anything, but I can save myself buddy... hand me the sword and stand back.
Yes, the years of err "dating" has anesthetized me from the excruciating truth that ... gasp! men at this present day and age are more likely to do the terrorizing than the saving. Misanthropic much? not really. Okay, not all guys (sheesh)
Anyway, I think the Prince Charming species have been wiped out by some meteor or genetic mutation. Chivalry is dead ladies, or it needs to be resuscitated.
What's my point exactly? Well, in Enchanted, the maiden (Giselle) got a pretty huge reality check. She was all- "I've been dreaming of a true love's kiss and a Prince I'm hoping comes with this" and then she meets him (Edward) and after what? ten minutes / seconds after they meet, the guy decides they should get married. But then Edy boy's step mum, the evil queen (Nerissa) decides to push our damsel into a well and sends her on a one-way trip to New York (in the middle of Time Square to boot).

side comment: Where exactly is this well? I ought to jump in there, beats buying a plane ticket....

Moving on, Giselle then meets this Divorce Lawyer, forgot his name (played by McDreamy himself) and he's all weirded out that Giselle is all "Butterflies and Rainbows" in other words, kind of nuts or she sounds like a person who ought to be thrown in the loony bin.
In the course of the tale, McDreamy informs Giselle that love is a lot more complicated, he then introduces the idea of "dating" going out for dinner and talking etc.
Giselle gets her chance to have her date with Edward, and surprise, surprise she realizes that they don't have a lot in common (and he's a total ditz) haha! I mean, the chipmunk seemed smarter, though, in Edward's defense, he was soooooo dreamy.
Do I need to tell you more? It's a forgone conclusion right? Giselle has a major epiphany that she's in love with the jaded Divorce Lawyer...Oooh and she ends up saving the day after the evil queen turns into a dragon and grabs our "dude" in distress.

There you go. The lesson my dear disenchanted audience is: Happily Ever After is a ruse to make kids believe that love is all- to use my previous description "Butterflies and Rainbows". It's not. but they will figure it out on their own, it's Ok if they believe that...

Love is actually a chemical imbalance in the brain (to quote a passage from Every Boy's Got One) It begins with the "attraction factor" thanks to Phenylethylamines. But again, it wears off. It's quite the same as ingesting large quantities of chocolate.
Yeah, single ladies, hear that? go crazy with the chocolate... it's the same.
What makes romantic love last? Endorphins... or to put it in fairly simple terms... You have to make love (not sex exactly) I mean "create love" and remake it. Keep it fresh, as it were.

It's not easy really. It's not as simple as how the classic fairy tales make it look. Sure, you bicker, get tired of each other, quirks drive you stark raving mad, you become busy and uh... women become monsters five days (give or take) every month (sorry guys, we can't help it) but hey... a kiss, hug, and whatever moments that you can have will always remind you why you love that person in the first place. (Eww.... the sugar is giving me a toothache)
It's true. It's about fighting (not killing each other or beating each other up) by fighting, I mean, you defend your relationship, even if the other is about to give up and even if you're also about to throw in the towel too.
It is complicated, but according to my Anthropology teacher

"You have to get hurt when you love someone, it is the only way to make you appreciate it, to make you aware that ' this is it' you're worthy of having it in your possession because you're fighting to keep it. It won't be fun all the time, but not a lot of people get to experience they joy and frustration of loving someone. You should be grateful to be one of the lucky few who get to feel that way"

Okay, he wasn't exactly that eloquent, but that is my spin to his take on love.
So you see, I have grown up. I still think fairy tales are cool (did I actually use that term?) yeah, they are great. The difference now that I am uhem... 21 years old is I'm not waiting on my "Happily Ever After" anymore.

What do I want?
I've made it obvious...
Here it is in a song...

I want a little something more
Don't want the middle or the one before
I don't desire a complicated past
I want a love that will last

Say that you love
Say im the one
Don't kiss and hug me and then try to run
I don't do drama
My tears don't fall fast
I want a love that will last

(Chorus)
I don't want a just a memory
Gives me forever
Don't even think about saying good-bye
Cuz i want just one love to be enough
And remain in my heart till i die


So call me romantic
Oh i guess that must be so
Theres something more that you oughta know
I'll never leave you
So don't even ask
I want a love that will last

Forever
I want a love that will last
I want a love that will last

(Chorus)
I don't want a just a memory
Give me forever
Don't even think about saying good-bye
Cuz i want just one love to be enough
And remain in my heart till i die

So theres little more that i need
I wanna share all the air you breathe
I'm not the kinda girl to complicate the past
I want a love that will last

Forever
I want a love the love that last
Always
I just want a love that will last
Want a love that will last

Artist: Renee Olstead
Song: A Love That Will Last

There. hopefully I don't sound so bloody maudlin.

The End